Wash the bottles, load the dish washer, clean the kitchen,
dust, clean the floor, vacuum, laundry, change diapers, feed the baby, cuddle
the baby, play with the baby… this is why I never have anything to write about!
But, shhh the baby is finally sleeping, the laundry is done, bottles are
washed, the house is clean and the dish washer is running!
I got Morgan to sleep by 8:30 picked up, waxed my eye brows,
and painted my nails by 10:00 and I feel like I accomplished some great
challenge!
It’s really hard to find inspiration to write when the only
thing I do is clean and take care of Morgan. I don’t know if it is just me but
I feel like when Morgan was born that was the end of Laney and the start of
Morgan’s Mama. I feel like I have lost myself and I need to get at least a
little of me back and since it’s a new
year – YAY 2015- and I am trying to learn to make some time for myself. What
great timing I have, I decide to start right when I hear the words every wife
wishes they never had to hear “See you later.” This is not the first time I
have heard this and it for sure won’t be the last and in the grand scheme of
things 5 weeks really isn’t that long right? WRONG! To me 5 weeks feels like
forever. Forever when it is the first time I have been apart from James for
more than 10 days in 2 years and it’s the first time I will be alone with
Morgan for that long. Let’s also not forget that my husband is my best friend
and being apart from him for 5 weeks, not able to talk to him for 3 weeks is
FOREVER. But that is what I have to do. That is what I agreed to when I married
James. I knew going into this that his job is demanding and will take him away
from me many times for varying amounts of time. What I have to remind myself
often is that this is not forever. It is a blip in the course of the rest of
our lives and it will only make me more independent and us stronger. Distance
makes the heart grow fonder right?
So it begins 5 weeks! We are one week in and though I am not
a fan this week did go by faster than I anticipated it would. I managed to say
see ya later and drive away before the tears fell and while Morgan is too
little to know why daddy isn’t here it is obvious that she does know. She does
not, I mean DOES NOT, want to go to bed at night. I think she is trying to wait
on daddy to come home. But luckily James recorded a voice mail and a video for
her so I play those back to her often. I have been trying to fill up my days
with things to do to keep me busy but there is only so much you can do with a
tight budget and a 6 month old haha! I am lucky enough to have great friends
(neighbors) that want to come over a lot and I just updated my Netflix Queue
with some movies that are supposed to be really good!
Back to finding time for me- The past two days I have
managed to do a little something for myself each day.
Yesterday: After Morgan went to sleep for the night I took a
nice long, hot bath with a nice lavender candle burning on the side of the bath
tub.
Today: After Morgan went to bed for the night I waxed my eye
brows and painted my finger nails.
I am finding a theme here and it looks like me time starts
when Morgan’s day ends. I do have a
massage scheduled for February 2nd! Eeek I can’t wait for that!
I bought a Women’s Health magazine thinking I would read it
and get some motivation to work out but really all I did was look at the
pictures and think “How do people with babies have time to work out?” and “When
did Brittany Spears get back to looking like that?” I guess I could be working
out right now…hmmm
I would really like to find a Mommy and Me yoga or aerobics
class. I think that would be fun for me and Morgan would love it! Add that to the
growing list of things on my to–do list
I guess my biggest challenge right now is to find balance. A
balance between being Morgan’s Mama and being Laney without giving up the
quality of either one.
Calling all Mamas! What do you do to make time for yourself? Leave me a
comment and let me know!
-Laney
